85 Thoughts an ADD Introvert Has When Going to Church

Someone posted a link on Introverts the other day on Facebook, which got me thinking how being an introvert affects different parts of my life.  With my animals, I think it helps me.  With people though,  I tend to only have a few friends, but the one(s) I have, I am very close to…when I’m not being an introvert.  Bless them though, because for the rest of the world, I an be closed off, which means for those select few, they get to hear…a lot.  Poor things!  I do try and listen to,, so, hopefully they will continue putting up with me. Anyway, the article was “75 Thoughts all Introverts have at Parties” so, here’s my Church-y spin on it:  (and let me preface this by saying that I love my church.  It for sure gets me out of my comfort zone, but as a Christian, I think that is just what we  are called to do.  It is refreshing.  It soothes my soul.  And I love worshiping, and growing with like minded believers.  Even when it’s not so “easy” for me.)

85 Thoughts an ADD Introvert Has When Going to Church:

1.  OK, remember where we parked…remember where we parked…

2.  Now…where did we park?

3.  OK, time to sign my kid in…wait…what’s our last name?

4. OK, name tag on…torn…but on.

5. Kid is screaming for me not to leave…please nobody look over here…..

6.  Kid dropped off…Oh great, now I’m late for church…

7.  Mmmm….so thankful to have coffee now.

8. Don’t spill coffee…don’t spill coffee…

9.  Great, I have coffee on my shirt now….

10. Yay, my pew in the balcony is empty!

11.  Is anyone looking at me?  Wait, did I put on deoderant on this morning?  Pretty sure I did.

12.  Aww, someone said Hi to me.  I have no idea who she is?…

13. Wait…should I know who she is?

14. I think I taught her daughter in SUnday School.

15. Or was it her son?

16. Crap.

17. Oh, sorry God.

18. A standing song…I can do this…

19. What do I do with my hands now?

20. Folding them makes me look uninterested.

21. Hey, look at that guy holding his hand up.

22. That’s actually pretty cool.

23. I am so never doing that though.

24. Well, maybe I could put my palms up.

25. Or maybe to the side.

26. Yes, I think I could do the side thing.

27. Everyone is sitting down…I was just about to unfold my hands!

28. Pastor is praying, time to close my eyes..

29. I wonder if everyone else has their eyes closed?

30. This sermon is really good!

31. Great, there is a big stain on my jeans!

32. Wait, should I be wearing jeans at church?

33. Maybe I should start wearing slacks.

34. Or a dress.

35. Does God really care?

36. Should I have said “Amen!” just then?

37. Oh, I think I should’ve!

38. Have I been moving my leg like this the whole time?

39. I wonder if anyone else noticed?

40. Oh, hello Person Who I don’t Remember Your Name, I guess we’re supposed to hold hands to pray now.

41. Am I squeezing too tightly?

42. Not enough?  What if I’m not holding her hand enough, and making her do all the work?

43. Are my palms sweaty?

44. Aww, she squeezed my hand at the end.

45. I’m going to pray for her today.

46. Just not out loud.

47. Time to leave.  What answer should I give today when asked “Hey, How are you?”

48. Made it through the crowd.

49. Do I know that lady? ‘

50. Should I say Hi?

51. What if I say her name wrong?

52. Maybe I could just say Hi without using her name.

53. Whatever it is.

54. Ok, time for Sunday School.

55. Should I be early or late?

56. I think early, so my back side seat doesn’t get taken.

57. Wait, what is someone doing sitting in my seat?

58. Oh, they’re new.

59. I’m glad they are visiting our class!

60. Oh, wait…are they new?

61. Should I talk to them?

62. Time to pray.

63. Should I pray out loud?

64. What if I mess up someone’s name?

65. Oh, she prays so well.

66. Are we still praying?

67. Should I open my eyes and see?

68. Where is the book of Hosea?

69. How does everyone find verses so quickly?

70. Wait, what was the verse again?

71. Maybe if I just keep my Bible open, it will look like I have the verse.

72. I hope they don’t call on me.

73. Wow – I talked out loud.

74. Go me!

75. Did I say the right things?

76. I think I rambled too much.

77. Crap.

78. Sorry God.

79. OK, time to go.

80.Wait, where did we park again?

81. Finally home.

82. I am so thankful for frozen meals, I am exhausted.

83. You know, those were some great points the Pastor brought up.

84. I wonder what next Sunday’s sermon will be about?…

85. I can’t wait for next Sunday!